Frequently Asked Questions

... WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF USING AdoptLink VERSUS NETWORKING MYSELF?

.....HOW DO I KNOW YOU ARE A REPUTABLE FACILITATOR and WHO ARE YOUR REFERENCES?

.....HOW MANY ADOPTIONS HAS AdoptLink BEEN INVOLVED WITH?

.....CAN WE SPECIFY THE SEX OF THE CHILD WE WANT TO ADOPT?

.....WHAT KIND OF ADOPTION OPPORTUNITIES DO YOU PRESENT?

.....WHO COLLECTS BACKGROUND AND MEDICAL INFORMATION ON THE BIRTHMOTHER?

.....HOW MUCH WILL THE ENTIRE ADOPTION PROCESS COST?

.....IF OUR ADOPTION FAILS, DO WE LOSE ALL OF OUR MONEY?

.....HOW LONG DOES THE BIRTHMOTHER HAVE TO CHANGE HER MIND?

.....DO I NEED TO HIRE AN ADOPTION ATTORNEY AND/OR AN ADOPTION AGENCY?

.....DO BIRTHPARENTS WANT AN "OPEN" ADOPTION?

.....HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE?

.....WHO DOES AdoptLink ACCEPT AS CLIENTS?

.....IS AdoptLink INVOLVED WITH BOTH INTERNATIONAL AND DOMESTIC ADOPTION?

.....CAN PROSPECTIVE ADOPTIVE PARENTS WHO ARE NOT USA RESIDENTS OR CITIZENS ADOPT WITHIN THE UNITED STATES?

copyright 1989 - 2025
 
 






























.....WHAT IS THE BENEFIT OF USING AdoptLink VERSUS NETWORKING MYSELF?

First, is the access to a major viable resource of adoption opportunities. The existing AdoptLink networking system currently enjoys professional relationships with qualified adoption professionals throughout the United States, who have potential adoption opportunities. 

Anytime these adoption professionals, primarily private licensed adoption agencies and AAAA adoption attorneys, are working with a qualified expectant mother for which they do not have an appropriate client base of prospective adoptive parents (PAPs), they may ask AdoptLink to network the information and to provide a particular "type" of family - perhaps YOU!  For instance, perhaps an expectant mother in Texas with a Caucasian baby desires PAPs who live in Northern California, Christian, age 35-45, no children, one stay-at-home parent, willing to share photos and letters. 

AdoptLink will link interested PAPs to potential birthparents who have already been evaluated by adoption professionals such as attorneys, social workers, etc. Information collected by these professionals, including assessment of level of commitment, medical, pregnancy, and social background, legal risk, financial requirements, birthfather status, etc. will all be known and available for PAPs up front. No guess work, no scrambling for information, no pressure to commit on the spot, fewer dead ends.

Most PAPs network by contacting friends, relatives, co-workers, and by sending enormous unsolicited mailings, using purchased mailing labels, to a variety of doctors, clinics, etc. placing their own ads, or joining advertising pools. Keep in mind that most PAPs are probably buying the same mailing label lists, thus, this flooding this avenue. Additionally, most of the individuals on the mailing lists do not have significant access to potential birthmothers to make your investment and effort worthwhile.

Placing ads is a very popular method of searching for domestic adoption opportunities. Choosing the "right" state and publication to run your ads can be like playing spin the bottle - you just take your chances. Not only is it very time-consuming to place ads, but you must also screen incoming calls. Most PAPs aren't available 24-hours a day at the phone receiving responses. Furthermore, most don't want to screen calls because they don't have the appropriate expertise, and are often too personally involved to be objective.

Second, is the cost component. Mass distribution of your profile letter or brochure with color photos can cost upward of $15.00 for each mailing, including the cost of printing your materials, envelopes, postage, mailing labels, not to mention the dollar value of your time to complete this effort. Most adoption professionals advise their clients to distribute at least 5000 letters, which is an approximate minimum cost of $15,000.00! Likewise, running ads can be an expensive venture. One ad in a major national newspaper or magazine circulation may cost $400.00 or more for publication for one week or month. When it's over, it's over, whether you have any responses or not!

<Return to Questions>

.....HOW DO I KNOW YOU ARE A REPUTABLE FACILITATOR and WHO ARE YOUR REFERENCES?

Since 1989, I have worked with ethical, reputable, successful adoption agencies and attorneys in the United States. I provided adoption facilitation services under my previous company name of "Adoption Connection of California". In July, 1997, I gave my company a face-lift with a new name - AdoptLink - and expanded my services to an international level, including Internet access and exposure.

You are encouraged you to speak with clients regarding their experiences.  I am confident that the client and professional references will speak highly of the quality of service I provide.
See About Lil Snee.

<Return to Questions>

.....HOW MANY ADOPTIONS HAS AdoptLink BEEN INVOLVED WITH?

I personally have been involved in facilitating hundreds of successful adoptions during the course of my affiliations with various adoption professionals since 1989. Since July, 1997, I have presented numerous attractive adoption opportunities to AdoptLink clients and on the AdoptLink web site. Click here for a history of adoption opportunities presented over the past several years. I publish an average of 10 new situations every month.

As adoption professionals throughout the country absorb the concept and success of the service AdoptLink provides, I anticipate that there will be many more  adoption opportunities for PAPs.

<Return to Questions>

.....CAN WE SPECIFY THE SEX OF THE CHILD WE WANT TO ADOPT?

Yes, you can declare a gender preference.

However, there is no guarantee that a child will be born a particular sex, unless determined by amniocentesis, which is considered an invasive surgical procedure, and never performed merely for gender determination.

Ultrasound impressions are not definitive.

When the gender of an unborn child is unknown, and adoptive parents are interested in only a boy, or only a girl, they may ask the expectant mother if she is willing to have an ultrasound at their expense.

PAPs must understand that ultrasound is a diagnostic tool by which the technician and/or physician might offer to state the suspected gender of the child.  However, there is no guarantee concerning the declaration of gender.  There is a margin of error in gender determination by ultrasound due to fetal anatomy and/or experience of the technician and/or physician interpreting the ultrasound.

The difficulties that might occur if the child is a different gender than expected at birth can be monumental for everyone involved.

For example:  You want a girl only. Gender determination by ultrasound is stated to be a girl.  You and expectant mother eagerly pursue an adoption plan together.  Baby is born a boy.  You don't accept the child because you want a girl only.  Birthmother is devastated and has to select a different adoptive family - almost on the spot -  without benefit of time to get to know them.  For this reason, a potential birthmother will not likely select a family who proclaims, "We will only accept a girl, nothing else".

<Return to Questions>

.....WHAT KIND OF ADOPTION OPPORTUNITIES DO YOU PRESENT?

Every variety available by referring professionals! AdoptLink will present potential birthparents and children from all avenues of racial, ethnic, social, economic, professional, educational, and religious backgrounds, newborns and children of all ages, healthy children, children with medical and physical impairments, children born drug-exposed, special needs, etc.

Potential birthparents and their children come from diverse avenues. They contact adoption professionals anywhere from two weeks into the pregnancy to anytime after the birth. Therefore, it would not be fair to stereotype potential birthparents and their children into a general category or description. Every individual person and situation must be considered and respected as an entity, without preconceived notions.

Carrying a child for nine months and then entrusting the baby to PAPs is a tremendously important decision. In order for a woman to plan this and follow-though with her commitment, she must have some very motivating factors. Some examples of motivating factors can include, but are not limited to, a strong conviction that her child must have a two-parent traditional family, her financial inability to raise a child, or perhaps she simply is not ready to be a parent, or does not desire to parent a child.

<Return to Questions>

.....WHO COLLECTS BACKGROUND AND MEDICAL INFORMATION?

The adoption professional assisting the potential birthparent/s will collect information including but not limited to name, age, race/ethnicity, Native American Indian heritage, address, phone, due date, marital status, who and where is the birthfather, does he know about her pregnancy/adoption decision, is he agreeable, reason for choosing adoption, physical description of both potential birthparents, do family and friends support the adoption decision, medical insurance, public assistance, means of support, education, job skills, interests, prenatal care, sex of child, drug, alcohol, cigarette use, HIV and general personal and familial medical/psychological/social history, willingness to undergo drug/HIV testing and other tests requested by the adoptive parents, what characteristics she desires in an adoptive family such as age, race, religion, other children, occupation, stay-at-home parent, willingness to select a single, gay, or lesbian parent, etc.

Adoption professionals routinely ask the potential birthmother to provide a verification of her pregnancy before presenting adoptive parents to her. PAPs are strongly cautioned not to provide financial assistance to any potential birthmother until pregnancy is verified, and upon advise from their adoption attorney and/or adoption agency.

The adoption professional presenting the adoption oppoprtunity typically asks the potential birthmother to complete a comprehensive social, medical, general background information questionnaire, including information about the birthfather. She is asked to sign an authorization for any medical professional to release all pregnancy-related medical information to the adoptive parents. She will likely be asked to also provide a copy of her a driver's license or other official identification, and to provide a color photograph of herself, other children, and of the birthfather if available. When PAPs and a particular potential birthmother are considering each other, all written information concerning her and her situation can be requested by the PAPs.

AdoptLink and the referring adoption professionals may obtain information from the potential birthmother concerning, but not limited to, medical and social history, and use of drugs, cigarettes, and alcohol before and during pregnancy, and identity, medical and social history, and whereabouts of alleged, legal, and presumed birthfather/s. AdoptLink does not perform investigative services and cannot corroborate the veracity of any information received.

Ask your legal representative to review all the available information concerning the adoption opportunity, and to inform you of legal rights and risks.

<Return to Questions>

.....HOW MUCH WILL THE ENTIRE ADOPTION PROCESS COST US?

The cost of a completed adoption can vary depending on the adoption agency and legal fees involved, facilitation and counseling fees, the financial assistance for the birthmother, and where you and the potential birthmother reside. Most states allow the adoptive family to assist the expectant mother with pregnancy-related expenses. These expenses might include rent, food, utilities, medical, counseling, transportation, and maternity clothing. Most potential birthmothers who contact adoption professionals have or are eligible for public assistance or have private medical insurance. The estimated average contribution toward birthmother expenses (when allowed) is ranges from $0 - $15,000 approximately. The current national average cost of domestic adoption ranges from $25,000 to $40,000. 

<Return to Questions>

.....IF OUR ADOPTION FAILS, DO WE LOSE ALL OF OUR MONEY?

All financial assistance PAPs provide to a birthmother is, by law, considered a gift and is not refundable. (not tax-deductible). Refund policies vary among adoption professionals. 

<Return to Questions>

.....HOW LONG DOES THE BIRTHMOTHER HAVE TO CHANGE HER MIND AFTER WE HAVE THE CHILD?

Click here for an overview of adoption law state-by-state  information concerning:



When the adoption consent, surrender, relinquishment may be signed
Time allowed to revoke after signing a consent, surrender, relinquishment
When the adoption can be finalized
Requirement to return to the sending state for the final hearing
Birthfather Registry
Financial assistance for medical and/or living expenses
Nonresident petitioners and finalization
Permission for petitioners to retain an adoption facilitator

<Return to Questions>

.....DO I NEED TO HIRE AN ADOPTION ATTORNEY AND/OR AN ADOPTION AGENCY?

Services by an adoption attorney are essential for both agency adoptions and independent adoptions. In many cases, an attorney is already involved in the adoption process or I will refer you to attorneys. PAPs must have legal advice and services of a competent adoption attorney, in your state, and/or the state where the potential birthparents reside in order to assure that you will be able to legally adopt the child. Involve the attorney and/or adoption agency immediately upon your desire to enter into an adoption plan with any potential birthmother. It is not advisable for any adoptive parent to provide any financial assistance to any potential birthmother without the guidance of a qualified attorney and/or adoption agency.

<Return to Questions>

.....DO BIRTHPARENTS WANT AN "OPEN" ADOPTION?

The majority of potential birthmothers who contact adoption professionals prefer what is considered an "open" adoption. This means that the she and the PAPs have exchanged identifying information about each other, hopefully have spoken to each other, and have possibly met each other.

The type of ongoing contact after the adoption, if any, is a decision made between the potential birthmother and the PAPs. Arrangements for ongoing communication, such as sharing photos and letters, or engaging in telephone or personal visits, can vary from structured to casual, or there may no continuing communication at all. Post-adoption contact agreements are enforcable by law in approximatgely 27 states. Your adoption attorney and/or adoption agency should advise you concerning this aspect of your adoption planning.

There are, however, many potential birthmothers who prefer traditional closed adoptions, or who will consider receiving limited identifying information about the PAPs, and agree to limited or no continuing communication after the adoption.

AdoptLink considers everyone's desires concerning adoption during the interviewing and referral process.

<Return to Questions>

.....HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE?

Thee average time for PAPs to enter into an adoption plan with a birthmother varies. Some PAPs may have an adoption plan commitment with a potential birthmother within days of retaining AdoptLink, depending on their desirability to the expecntant mothert and the desires of the PAPs. Other PAPs receive a child already born into their home within days, while some families may wait several months.

PAPs who are flexible regarding race and gender of the child will wait a much shorter period of time than those who stipulates a specific race, gender, birth location, or estimated cost of the adoption. The length of time truly depends upon the flexibility of the PAPs, as well as the potential birthmother who selects them.

AdoptLink does not guarantee that any client will be selected by a potential birthmother, or that an adoption will be successfully completed.

It is important that PAPs be available by cell phone. There are times when adoption opportunities develop quickly (baby just born) and we must respond immediately. When this happens, it is imperative that PAPs be accessible. If clients cannot be reached, opportunities could be lost.

<Return to Questions>

.....IS AdoptLink INVOLVED WITH BOTH INTERNATIONAL ADOPTION AND DOMESTIC ADOPTION?

While AdoptLink assists PAPs throughout the world to adopt in the USA, all children to be adopted are in the USA.  

<Return to Questions>

.....WHO DOES AdoptLink ACCEPT AS CLIENTS?

AdoptLink is ready to assist PAPs who reside anywhere in the world where permitted by law. AdoptLink, is available to PAPs of all races, ethnic, cultural, and religious backgrounds, traditional and alternative lifestyles, gay and lesbian families, married couples, single parents, etc. throughout the world. AdoptLink does not approve PAPs for adoption. This is the function of a private or public adoption agency, licensed social worker, Central Authority in any Hague-member country etc., licensed to perform this task.

<Return to Questions>

.....CAN PROSPECTIVE ADOPTIVE PARENTS WHO ARE NOT USA RESIDENTS OR CITIZENS ADOPT WITHIN THE UNITED STATES?

Yes. However, there are some limitations concerning where PAPs may adopt.

PAPs from any country or state can adopt a child in the state the child resides, if that state permits nonresident petitioners. The entire adoption process, including finalization will occur in that state as well. The Hague Convention may apply to PAPs who reside abroad.  I am a supervised Hague provider and able to assist PAPs who must complete a Hague adoption.

Click here to view a chart showing states that permit nonresidents to petition for adoption and finalize the adoption.

PAPs who are not residents of the United States must obtain the equivalent of an American homestudy and comply with the laws of their country and state governing adoption. 

<Return to Questions>

copyright 1989 - 2025


AdoptLink ~ Lil Snee
Adoption Educator, Facilitator, Consultant
24662 Soquel - San Jose Road
Los Gatos, CA  95033-9226

408-353-4522 tel
408-353-2725 fax

California ~ Pacific Time

lilsnee@adoptlink.com

Home
Intro
FAQ
Counseling
Positive Language
Adoption Opportunities
About Lil Snee
AdoptLink Agreement
Contact Lil Snee
Resources

AdoptLink ~~~ innovative and unique adoption facilitation since 1989
AdoptLink is not an adoption agency or a law firm

.